In Our Unspoken Words
- ayarosah
- Nov 21, 2024
- 3 min read

I.
Coming in with little to expect,
But yearning to connect to meet your depth.
In quick respect, I had to subject
That despite my well-intent
It had an undesirable effect.
I learned quickly I would not be let in,
Because my predecessors before me,
Had already set what is there to expect.
Recognizing the wide disparity,
How we would never meet in the middle,
I am in reject,
But not quite yet taking in to accept.
Rather, I cross the threshold,
To let go of my pride, to sit alongside,
Even without your words to explain,
To do the mundane,
For it is one’s presence that makes the heart inclined in due time.
Oh, how I enjoy the warmth that seeps in,
With giggles and cackles that settle in.
To see your personality, quirks, and the spark within,
That is yet to set ablaze in the proper kiln.
II.
But the more I get to know you, and the more connections I make,
I begin to hear your thoughts and the stirs of dismay.
All I can do is offer an ear without much to say,
And to walk away to ponder the sonders.
But when the sun sets to the evening hour,
And the thoughts speak to the heart much louder,
The wrenched-heart cannot contain the deep ache,
But bring one to collapse onto the ground,
Grapple the chest while banging the floor,
To then allow the stinging tears to flow.
The heart is torn between the different spaces it holds,
To bear the undeserving inequities bequeathed,
To the past history, the living present, and the coming future.
Oh, how the sadness brews into anger,
Until the passion cannot hold out much longer,
Getting a glimpse of how your years of yonder
Of defeated spirits have wandered.
Yet, this is only a glimpse of your long hours,
How I cannot make my privilege a reason for disavowal,
To throw in the towel
And run away from my commitment to our espousal.
Though I feel incapable,
With odds that seem unattainable,
I will find ways to fan the flame, in hopes it sustains.
While the fruits may not bear in our togetherness,
All is not done in vain.
As long as the groundwork has been laid,
For the roots to be embedded
And the seeds to be watered with abundant shower.
III.
However, in our attempts to speak to each other,
Our understandings are processed in different shades of color.
We get frustrated in our ability to convey,
With the barriers that seem to outweigh.
This includes the words I wish you had to say,
To portray what was on your heart,
Even in your state of disarrays.
For I would never walk away,
Rather cherish and guard your soul’s deepest desires.
So instead, maybe I spoke the words you longed to tell,
And added a little more, not holding back, to compel,
As to inspire is to breathe life and empower.
IV.
With all this in mind,
Despite our vast divide and chasm between us,
At the end of the day,
It is what our hearts take away,
To see our actions and efforts on display.
And as time evades and our memories fade,
The details blur, but the feelings engraved.
May you never forget the warmth and adoration in my devotion.

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